If you tend to have fear or negative thoughts, you need to start using positive thoughts instead. Self talk is incredibly powerful. Help shape the way you think about yourself. Are you allowing your self-talk to stir up your fears, doubts, and negatives about yourself? If so, it’s time to replace any of those thoughts with a positive self-naming.

Your goal in this case is to speak positively to yourself and not focus on a negative relationship with yourself. Your fear of being alone can make you feel like no one loves you or that no one understands you. You need to replace your negative thoughts with positive ones and realize that you are the one who needs you the most and that you are very valuable. The intrinsic value that you have is really important and you must recognize it to accept yourself as you are.

You are a person with courage

Remind yourself that you are a person of value. Look for positive attributes in yourself that are commendable and that you can focus on again when you have emotions about the fear of being alone. Dispel the unpleasant feelings of loneliness and fear by replacing them with positive thoughts that you are a valuable person full of virtues, even if you also have defects, these are not only defined for you.

Accept that you can be alone

It’s okay to be alone. You don’t need another person in your life to be a person of value. You are worthy because you are you. It’s okay to be single to have few friends and to feel good about it. Find the positives in single and loosely involved relationship states, so you can be okay either way. Your value is not based on the status of your relationship or the number of friends you have.

Don’t pursue what is emotionally unavailable

Some people with a fear of being alone tend to repeatedly seek relationships with people who are emotionally unavailable. Instead of looking for the emotionally impossible, it’s time to break the cycle and look for partners or friends who are ready, willing, and emotionally capable of maintaining a relationship with you. If you have a long pattern of these unhealthy and emotionally unaffordable relationships, then therapy can be quite helpful for you.

Have a support network

For some people with a fear of abandonment, they become very dependent on their romantic relationships due to their habit of giving too much and receiving little in return. This causes other relationships to fall by the wayside and frustrate them about it.

It is difficult to maintain friendships with others when you are obsessed with one person and exclude others. Do you talk foolishly about your partner when you are with friends? These behaviors do not help you create meaningful relationships with others.

To have a balanced life, you need real friends, even if they are in small quantity but with good quality. You need a network of people who can be your support system. That way, if your romantic relationship fails, you will have the encouragement, love, and support of friends and family around you.


To enhance friendship, do activities with other people. Activities that you like like running, singing, dancing … activities that are done with other people. But don’t waste your precious time with just one person for fear of being alone in life.

Practice awareness to notice when you start with toxic behaviors for fear of being alone and so you can stop them in their tracks. Remember that if you act based on fear, you will have inappropriate behaviors with other people. First you must learn to be good with yourself alone , know that you need yourself more than anyone else, and in this way you will learn to have healthier relationships with others.  

Elle Mcdonald

I am Elle Mcdonald Specializations in Psychology . Graduated in psychology from the University of Tennessee in 2000. Diploma of Advanced Studies in the Department of Personality, Evaluation and psychological treatments with excellent results.

First Level of Master in Clinical Psychology at the Center for Behavioral Therapists (recognized with a scientific-professional nature by the College of Psychologists)

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