Not all friends are healthy, in fact, there are some friends who are not healthy at all. Sometimes friends are toxic and can be false friends who just want to take advantage of you, especially when they try to control or manipulate you. Although it is difficult to accept this fact when you realize it, do not feel bad. There are many friendships that are made up of false friends or evil people, what matters is that you realize what is happening and learn to distinguish good friends from bad ones and that the latter leave your life as soon as possible.
There are people who are good at making others believe that they are true friends when in fact they are not. They are based on power and control over you. As a result of this, it is necessary to identify the characteristics of these supposed friends in order to dispense with that friendship and be able to continue with your life. Learn to differentiate the main characteristics about the controller ‘friends’.
1. It is demanding
This type of ‘friend’ will want to demand irrational things from you and will want you to leave everything when he needs you, if he does this, it is because he wants to have control over you. He may also require you to spend more time with him / her than with other people … He may even make weird comments about the way you dress just to keep track of what you wear.
If you do not comply with their demands, you will tell yourself that you are a bad person. But remember that only you should have control over friendship decisions and friendship with a person who wants to control you will not be a good friendship at all.
2. He doesn’t respect you as a person
If your friend makes fun of you ‘as a joke’ or insults you ‘but you shouldn’t take it too badly’ or tells you that you are overly sensitive, that friend is not your friend and it is not a healthy friendship. It is even capable of imposing the feelings that you ‘should’ feel without taking into account your true feelings.
They may also accuse you of being selfish if you tell them that you can’t do something that is good for that person but not for you. Don’t be fooled, this kind of friendship is not healthy. You must be in control of your emotions and feelings and if he ridicules you for feeling in any particular way, then that friendship is not for you.
3. Think that you are superior to yourself
When your friend demands special treatment, it is a sign of behavior control. This type of ‘ friend ‘ may use sarcasm when talking to you and always act like they have a divine reason about everything. He can be condescending to you and not care how you feel.
4. Will play the victim
To control you, he will also become the victim of any disagreement but deep down he likes to oppose you. They can also show drastic changes in mood or have sudden emotional outbursts. In general, controlling friends feed off the drama and will seek to turn a normal conflict or disagreement into a major offense. He may even gossip about you behind your back. If you notice that he always wants to provoke you, better stay away.
5. He is manipulative
A manipulative person will use your compassion, your values, your fears or whatever they can use to control you and the situation to their advantage. They can also control you by making you feel guilty for achieving your goals. They can exaggerate your flaws or humiliate you in public just for being on top of you. Remember that a good friend would never embarrass or humiliate you, so if ‘that friend’ makes you uncomfortable, don’t ignore this and walk away from that friendship that is getting sickly.
Friendship is a great treasure, but for it to be, it must be real. Toxic people are best kept away from you.