When a romantic relationship ends, the feelings you have can be very ambivalent for those who suffer from it. Romantic obsessions and feelings of dependency often go hand in hand . Sometimes the obsession with a person is the result of unrequited love, it is like having an addiction to love, and like any other addiction it is necessary to overcome that obsession and dependence on relationships.
It may be for having broken up with a person or a secret love that is not reciprocated. You may have a fantasy that the particular person might meet all of your unmet emotional needs. You may have thoughts like, “If I could only be with this person, everything would be fine and nothing else would matter.” If you think that you can have certain obsessive thoughts about other people on a romantic level, it is necessary for your mental health and to avoid even legal problems, that you take into account how to overcome these romantic obsessions (which could only bring you problems).
Get over that obsession
Get rid of the things that remind you of that person
In order to have a quiet life and enjoy a true romantic love , it is necessary that there is not an iota of obsession … because then it would be a toxic love. To begin to overcome that obsession it is necessary that you throw all the photos or any sentimental memory. You will have to separate yourself from objects that only serve to increase your obsessions.
Be careful with the social networks
Social networks can fuel the problem so it is important that you disconnect from their Facebook page , Twitter or their blog. Sitting around looking at their photos or reading their updates will only make your obsession worse. Do not go by his house, do not call with an unknown number and then hang up, do not check if he is online when you get into WhatsApp … Force yourself to stop these behaviors. No matter how difficult it may seem at first, it will get easier the more you do it.
Fantasizing about that person shouldn’t be a priority
Ask yourself if fantasizing about him takes precedence over other activities in your life. Daydreaming and fantasizing is dangerous if it occurs while you are driving or if it interferes with your interpersonal relationships or your work. Having someone else in your head all the time will only make your obsession worse, in this sense, it begins to distract your mind with other activities that really should be a priority in your life.
Distract your mind
As we have pointed out above, you need to distract your mind once you feel your thoughts take on a life of their own. Get out of your house and go for a walk. Call a friend or watch a family movie . You can immediately do something to change your mind as soon as you feel prey to your negative feelings or obsessive thoughts.
Go to therapy
If you realize that no matter how hard you try, you still have a problem with obsession, you will have to go to a psychology professional to help you sort your thoughts and overcome that obsession that will only cause you to have emotional problems. Obsessive seeking approval, acceptance, and emotional care for another person is often the result of childhood trauma or abuse. You are looking for someone who you believe can heal your wounds for life and heal you. You become obsessed with that person because you believe that they will provide you with the security and love that you have been looking for. Talking to a therapist will give you perspective and help you deal with these issues and possibly resolve them.
Work on improving your self-esteem
Your self-esteem and self-confidence are of great importance in all of this. Obsessive people lack self-esteem. Spend some time developing your positive attributes. Find your hidden talent and do something creative. Focus on taking good care of yourself by eating right, exercising and getting enough sleep … you will be amazed at the changes you will have in your life !
Remember that if you realize that your life cannot be the same due to your obsessions … You need to seek help as soon as possible.