Communicating with a person suffering from depression is not an easy task , much less living with them. When someone suffers from this disorder, nothing is like before, everything changes around them. It is an alteration in his state of mind that undermines him internally and transmits it in the form of sadness and indifference for everything that made him smile.
Sometimes the reason that leads a person to have depression is not known with certainty . However, in most cases it is given by certain circumstances that sink those who suffer from it and, therefore, their loved ones . Feeling that that person whom they appreciate so much no longer enjoys what they used to love, that they have lost their smile and sense of humor, and that they are always sad and downcast leads them to feel helpless and desperate for not being able to do anything to contribute to their improvement and to see and feel who they used to have next to them.
But not only that, but also depression leads those who suffer from it to look down on those around them unconsciously due to their irritable character . Without a doubt, it is a complicated disease that can even alienate people due to the behaviors shown by those who are haunted by this disorder. However, we must not leave the sick person alone. In these cases, empathy is the best tool , and we have to hold on to it so as not to distance ourselves from those who suffer from depression and whose illness does not allow them to show their true self .
Active listening, the first step
It is essential for the recovery of individuals with depression to listen to them, which does not mean that we understand their discomfort . We must let them tell us how they feel at all times, even if we find no reason for that feeling to catch them and eat them up inside. When you have expressed your discomfort, it is important to offer you alternatives to reduce that suffering and gradually bring happiness and well-being back to your life. An example of this may be to carry out an activity that he likes or simply show him your love with a simple hug. The main thing is that loneliness does not invade you at any time .
Couples, the most affected
Those who suffer the most and carry the greatest burden are the partners of those who have depression, since the constant concern for them and taking charge of everything leads them to feel too much weight on their back and a great exhaustion on a day-to-day basis. It is necessary that they show their support, and learn to ignore those behaviors towards them that are not the most appropriate but that those who suffer from the disorder do not do it with any intention, but the evil they experience leads them to perform them. However, recovery does not depend on them , but on the specialists. And it is essential to resort to them as soon as possible to combat the disease.
How to cope with the disease
Although the help of a professional is essential to move forward, there are some guidelines in coexistence to deal with a person with depression . For example, you must contribute to the running of the house, even if it is a minimum. Tasks must be shared in an agreed manner and always adjusting to the situation in which they are living. To this must be added other activities that can make you feel good, such as taking a walk. Above all, in any circumstance, the obligation should never be present.
“Run away” from problems
Having a person with depression by your side can lead to generating a feeling of guilt for needing to escape, to vent or simply for feeling tired due to the desperate situation they live. However, requiring all of these things is the most normal thing to do.
What you should never do
In order to know how to deal with a person who has depression, it is necessary to take into account the most frequent mistakes that both couples and the closest environment of the patient make, and that are not at all favorable for their recovery :
- Empathize in the extreme. As mentioned above, empathy is a very important factor, but sometimes it is such that it interrupts the rhythm of life of those who dedicate themselves body and soul to the patient. We must not let depression reach us too, and although we do not have to ignore the problem, it is important that we do not isolate ourselves from the world and continue with our routine and habits, without neglecting our hobbies.
- Be aggressive and blame them . Depression is not something that sufferers choose. It comes into their lives without warning. Therefore, we must fight against our bad mood and be aware that anger and lack of understanding are not going to get us anywhere. Therefore, we must always give the best of ourselves in the face of the sick.
- Compel . We never have to resort to compulsion, as forcing them to feel better will only exacerbate the problem. Motivation is the fundamental pillar and only in it we have to support ourselves.
- Incomprehension . We always manage to understand the behavior or feelings of the patient, but it is important that we strive to make him / her feel that we are with him / her. In this way we will prevent you from feeling helpless.
- “You are not the one from before . ” It is totally forbidden to pronounce this phrase. It is very important that you do not feel that you have turned your life upside down and that you have undergone a radical change. We need to help him feel that this is a temporary situation and that he can cope. Confidence is the first factor in beating the disease.
- Do everything for him / her . A person with depression must feel useful, and therefore we cannot do all the tasks that he / she does not want to do. We must always be willing to help, but never allow them to put aside those tasks that they used to do and that they must continue doing now.
- Do not reward small achievements . If every activity carried out is rewarded, we will only be able to increase the problem since the individual in question will not try to advance but will stay on the same line or even go backward, making recovery even more complicated.
With these tips in mind, dealing with a person with depression will be a bit easier. But this may not be enough. If this is the case, we must add to this the monitoring of a professional .