If there is a capacity that absolutely all human beings should put into practice during their lives, it is undoubtedly resilience . And it is that although this is a quite unknown quality, and of which very little is said at a general level, it is one of the capacities that should be prioritized the most in personal growth. Because resilience is the name given to that possibility that human beings have to adapt to the adverse situations that appear throughout their lives.

At first, it was considered that resilience was a condition that human beings already brought without having to work on it, which they incorporated from birth . Little by little, the definition of this term changed and, from the sixties, resilience began to be seen as a capacity that human beings developed throughout their lives . There are many and very varied studies on the matter of resilience, although if there is one thing that has been concluded, it is that this is a fundamental capacity when it comes to achieving a full life. Because thanks to resilience, adversity will be seen as something positive.

A person who has this ability will be able to manage his life in a totally different way . You will see possible traumas as a challenge, as something to be solved, a process that will lead you to be a different, stronger person. There are different circumstances that affect the development of each person’s resilience, making it greater or lesser; It depends a lot on the context, the family, the education received and, above all, the self-esteem that each person has. However, as a capacity that it is, resilience can develop on a daily basis. And everyone can get it!

It is a capacity that can be developed

Resilience is essential when facing any type of adversity , since it will be what makes us see this adversity as something positive. In order to develop this capacity, it is very important to work on self-esteem. This can be relatively complicated when a person is an adult and has a fairly poor conception of himself, that is why it is recommended that self-esteem is worked from when children are small.

But then what do we do if we are adults and do not consider ourselves a resilient person? Leave? Not much less! As already pointed out, resilience is still something that can be worked on. It may be difficult, it may take time, but it is not impossible at all. The first thing you must do if you want to become a resilient person is to work on yourself: analyze all your strengths and, in turn, your weaknesses. When you know yourself, when you are really aware of what you are capable of achieving, you can also set goals that you will achieve without too much trouble. You will be more objectivewith yourself, and that will prevent you from setting the bar for yourself at a point that you will not be able to reach. It does not imply that you despise all your goals, or that you believe that everything you have dreamed up to now was nothing more than impossible, but rather restructure your goals and adapt them to your life.

Once you are aware of your potentialities and of all those obstacles that you will have to face, you will also be able to trust your own abilities , because you will already know what they are. You will know that an adversity will not be a serious problem for you, but something that will make you grow and that will increase your potential.

To all this we must add objectivity . And it is that to be resilient, you must see life with the maximum possible objectivity (something for which the steps that we have already mentioned above will help you). This does not imply being negative , but quite the opposite: it is staying within positivity, but without forgetting that there may be some adversity external to you that you cannot control , and to which you will have to adapt.

In addition to self-confidence, you must work on creativity . Being creative is not just about drawing or writing, but also knowing how to take advantage of even the toughest situations. When a person is creative and has imagination, he can see that a layoff or failure is not the end of the world, but the possibility of finding a new job or redoing something that did not go well.

Resilience is achieved with work

However, resilience is not something that depends only on oneself, but also depends on the environment. But this does not imply that we should forget that we can influence our environment, because this would lead us to disengage from it. A resilient person is aware, for example, that surrounding himself with negative and toxic people will only hurt him in the long run; That is why they end up avoiding these types of people, creating a healthy environment around them that helps them develop as a person.

There are points that should never be forgotten when trying to develop resilience, and one of them is that there will be events, throughout your life, that you will not be able to control. Illnesses, accidents, misfortunes, decisions that depend on someone else … All these are circumstances that you cannot control and that, therefore, you must learn to let go. The middle ground, then, is knowing what to let go of and what to try to influence. You have to be flexible, let yourself be swayed in the air at times and know what your long-term goal is.

Last but not least, to build resilience it is important to know that outside help may become necessary at certain times . When a resilient person goes through a difficult or difficult time, they know that they will not be able to overcome it alone and they do not hesitate to seek help, either from a friend or a professional. Because you know that seeking help is a good thing, and not a sign of weakness!

Elle Mcdonald

I am Elle Mcdonald Specializations in Psychology . Graduated in psychology from the University of Tennessee in 2000. Diploma of Advanced Studies in the Department of Personality, Evaluation and psychological treatments with excellent results.

First Level of Master in Clinical Psychology at the Center for Behavioral Therapists (recognized with a scientific-professional nature by the College of Psychologists)

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