Telling someone you like him can be complicated , it is a time when we feel vulnerable because we do not know how that person is going to react and because we are exposing one of the strongest feelings that human beings can experience. This is why it is normal for you to feel nervous, scared and a little lost when thinking about how you are going to say it and when facing that moment.

The first thing you should know is that you should not worry, at some point in our life we ​​all find ourselves in this situation and we have gone through the same thing , remember that if the other person corresponds to you this will be wonderful and for that reason alone it is worth trying . This is why we are going to give you some advice on how to deal with this situation.

IS HE LISTENING TO YOU?

It may seem silly, but when we get nervous we tend to speak under something that makes the other person not be able to hear what we are saying well. This tendency to speak low we do it almost unconsciously as a way to excuse ourselves in case something goes wrong, but this is even worse since it can cause your message to be perceived as confusing and ambiguous and that the other person does not understand what it is. you want to tell him.

So that this does not happen to you, the best thing you can do is practice a little vocalizing in front of a mirror, but be careful, do not make this a script to memorize since this could make you even more nervous when trying to remember it exactly as you did when you practiced . What you really need to do is focus on your tone of voice and vocalization so that you get used to expressing your feelings clearly and concisely.

FORGET ABOUT THE NERVES

It is important that you do not become obsessed with not showing nervousness and trying to be calm, it is normal that you experience those feelings and that you show it is not going to make the other person give you a negative answer. The only thing you have to worry about is making the other person understand you and listen to what you want to convey to them.

Remember that, even if you feel nervous, from the point of view of other people this is noticeable much less than you notice it and practically in almost all cases the other person does not get to notice that nervousness on your part, so That this must be the least of your problems

In the same way, if it is any consolation, telling someone how you feel about him or her will also cause nervousness, so practically both of you will be equally nervous. You should pay attention to how that person reacts , not to the image you are giving them.

YOU WRITE THE KEY POINTS YOU WANT TO ADDRESS

The ideal in this situation is not that we make a script but we do make a list with the key points that we want to address. When it comes to transmitting our feelings, the nerves can play a trick on us and can make us forget what we really want to say, shame should be put aside and focus only on what you want to transmit , this is why what ordering your ideas into words or short and summarized sentences will allow you to make a mental scheme of what you are going to say to the other person. This will give you more security.

LOOK INTO THE EYES

Something that must be remembered when transmitting our feelings is the importance of looking directly into the eyes , and that is that, although we do not pay much importance to it, non-verbal communication has a lot to do with the image that we transmit to the other person. We must remember that we should not show a defensive or hostile attitude since this would contradict what we really want to say to the other person.

But as always, don’t get obsessed with this , just keep it in mind to make it easier for you to avoid looking away or crossing your arms.

EXPLAIN WHY YOU FEEL THIS

A good way to start your declaration of love is to tell him or her what you feel for him or her and explain why and from the time you started to feel it . This does not mean that you have to throw flowers or flatter his whole person, but simply what you have to explain is what your feelings are and since when you feel it . The way you do this will depend on the type of relationship you have with that person, you can tell them a little closer if you have confidence with that person or you can tell them a little further if it does not come out at that time to get closer. The important thing is that you take into account non-verbal language and that you avoid not looking at it since that will create a feeling of insecurityand you won’t be able to see how that person is reacting either. You don’t have to be constantly staring at him, but you should make eye contact every now and then.

DO NOT USE CLICHE PHRASES

Clichés are just that, clichés and they look a bit forced on anyone, (unless you use it as a joke ) so from Bekia we recommend that the way you convey your feelings to the other person you do it in a original way but above all, in a sincere way .

DON’T BACK UP

You may notice that as you say your speech the other person is confused, strange or that they are not behaving as they usually were. It is normal that if we are nervous or if we are negative we see this when it is not reality, remember that it is better to regret something we have done than to regret not having done something for whatever it is, say what you feel, do not shut up anything and try to be completely comfortable with what you have said. It is better not to go around the bush and say it directly than to get nervous in the middle of your speech and back off.

IF IT DOESN’T CORRESPOND TO YOU, IT’S NOT THE END OF THE WORLD

When we venture to express our feelings for someone it is because we can no longer take it anymore and we feel the need to say it, it is likely that the other person has given you indications that they feel something and that when you have discussed it with your friends they have encouraged you to tell them what you feel because they have also seen the same as you. However, it is possible that the other person does not correspond to you and we will be honest this has happened to all of us. If you have decided to tell him what you feel, you have done it assuming all the consequences and possibilities that this may have so if it does not correspond to you you should not regret, be ashamed or think why you have done it but on the contrary you should feel relieved because you have finally taken that weight off your shoulders and now you know the truth.

Elle Mcdonald

I am Elle Mcdonald Specializations in Psychology . Graduated in psychology from the University of Tennessee in 2000. Diploma of Advanced Studies in the Department of Personality, Evaluation and psychological treatments with excellent results.

First Level of Master in Clinical Psychology at the Center for Behavioral Therapists (recognized with a scientific-professional nature by the College of Psychologists)

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