Perhaps you have ever received a sincere compliment that has brightened your day and even your week. Have you ever received a compliment that made your day, or even the week, brighter? The right words at the right time can make a big difference in someone’s life. Think of the best compliment you have ever received. What makes it so special? Some compliments stand out from others and stick with you for a long time.
Those memorable words don’t have to come from a skilled poet or be overly flattering, but there are some things they have in common that make them stand out. Take note of these tips to practice them frequently and then soon there will be people with a big smile on their face.
Be a good observer
Attention to detail is the key to giving good compliments. Look for expressions of personality and you will find many things to admire, from a carefully selected pair of earrings to a well-groomed dog. Open your eyes and see where a special effort has been made , and then: acknowledge it.
There is nothing wrong with giving a compliment that is sweet and generic. Although if you want it to be remembered, you will have to prove that it really is true. Instead of telling someone that their dress is charming, explain why you find it that way. It is elegant? What fashion ? Does it fit you very well? Tell him why.
<24> Keep the compliment close
Unless there is a good level of intimacy, ask yourself if the compliment you want to give would receive a grade of 10. If the answer is yes then go for it, but if it is too flattering then reconsider doing it. Also remember that as a general rule of thumb, accessorizing anything covered by clothing is tricky territory.
Smile and use a clear tone of voice
People respond immediately to body language, and a warm smile is one of the most attractive gestures a person can make. If you give a compliment while looking upset or sad , the dissonance will be hard to ignore. Even if you’re tense or nervous, avoid sounding like a robot or speaking so softly that they have to ask you what you said a few times. This will make the words awkward and by the time they really understand what you said, the effect will be diminished by the inconvenience of it all.
Fake compliments are easier to spot than fake luxury brands. Never congratulate yourself something you really do not admire because it shows and people will remember … avoid the blatant exaggerations: tell someone who has the most beautiful eyes I’ve ever seen in your life can only run a handful of times. Likewise, if his joke is horrible, don’t laugh.
Avoid comparisons and qualifiers
You don’t need a third party to compose a good compliment . In fact, it’s the opposite: telling someone that you’ve done well or that you look good compared to someone else can be frustrating. This is especially important when you mention the appearance or physical characteristics of a person. You must forget to add a qualifier or condition to the compliment, for example, “You look beautiful for your age” or “You are very strong for a woman”: do not do it
Do not generalize
You meet a wonderful Italian guy at a party and you want to compliment his enthusiastic personality . Telling him that you love how all Italians are fiery and life-loving can backfire. You are also likely to come across as ignorant, misinformed, or offensive, even if you mean well.
Praise the effort
Sometimes it’s easy to focus on results and applaud concrete achievements. While there is nothing wrong with this, giving someone a word of encouragement along the way can mean so much more. Let a friend know that you really respect how they haven’t smoked in a few months; tell your foreign co- worker that his Spanish has improved a lot since you met him; tell yourself how proud you are that you have been consistent with that exercise routine. There is a long way to go before you reach your goals, and the right compliment can be a fantastic motivator.