t is inevitable … social networks raise envy, especially when you compare yourself with others and it seems that their lives are much better than yours. You must remember that people only publish on their networks what they want others to see, so they will not publish what they are ashamed of and much less will they publish their daily problems.

Therefore, the time has come for you to turn the envy of social networks into motivation for your life. Only in this way will you realize that your life is yours and that you do not have to compare yourself with others. You are the protagonist of your life, and also … the most important thing that happens in your day to day is not necessary that you publish it for others to see it, right? You don’t need “likes” to enjoy and be happy.

Think about reality

Most of the people who don’t share their epic life fail on social media. People tend to present the ‘highlights’ of their lives. So when we compare ourselves to others on social media, it’s not a fair comparison … or a real one. However, sometimes the freshest and most rational heads do not prevail when faced with impressive photos that at the same time dazzle and discourage. Even for the most sensible person, it is very easy to forget that social media is a distorted and filtered version of life.

Think of your own social networks, do they reflect your life perfectly? Probably not. If your posts don’t represent a completely accurate picture of your own problems , chances are it’s other people’s sources either. Remembering that we all design our social media with personal highlight reels, not our mistakes or faults, can help give you perspective when you’re feeling dissatisfied alongside someone else’s seemingly fabulous life.

Reframe your perspective

Just as social media represents a distorted reality, your thoughts that result from seeing all that can also be distorted. For example, when your friend posts photos of her polite and obedient preschoolers, you may conclude that you are a terrible parent because your children don’t act like angels all the time. This is what is called a cognitive distortion, an irrational, false or inaccurate thought or belief, and it can make you feel very bad if you allow it.

To counteract these corrosive thought patterns, it is necessary to do a cognitive restructuring , that is, to try to see a situation differently. For example, if you feel bad that your toddler is having non-stop tantrums when everyone else’s child appears to be angelic on social media, you can cognitively rethink how you feel by acknowledging that it is developmentally appropriate for your child to affirm their independence.

Increasing your awareness of cognitive distortions may take some practice, but over time, you will develop a personal radar and learn to reframe misfit beliefs into healthier, reality-based thoughts.

Focus on what’s good in your life

In the midst of a flood of perfect messages reminding you of what you’re missing, it’s hard to remember all the good things you already have. Reflecting on and being grateful for the positive in your life is essential when it comes to countering the negative impact of social media . A little gratitude is necessary in your life.

Gratitude reduces stress and depressive feelings while increasing overall satisfaction, well-being, and motivation to improve yourself. That is why you should count your good things every day. Try writing a thank you letter to a supportive friend, or keep a daily gratitude journal.

Turn envy into motivation

Comparison can be the thief of joy when you judge yourself as if you don’t measure up, but it doesn’t have to be. In fact, a little envy might be just what you need to kickstart your self-improvement goals.

Social comparisons are most beneficial when used for inspiration. In some cases, it can be motivating to compare yourself to someone. For example, you could be on a race team and compare your race times with other teammates. By doing so, you are motivated to improve your own performance. So the next time you feel the monster of envy rearing its ugly head, channel that energy into positive vibes that will stimulate you. 

Elle Mcdonald

I am Elle Mcdonald Specializations in Psychology . Graduated in psychology from the University of Tennessee in 2000. Diploma of Advanced Studies in the Department of Personality, Evaluation and psychological treatments with excellent results.

First Level of Master in Clinical Psychology at the Center for Behavioral Therapists (recognized with a scientific-professional nature by the College of Psychologists)

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