If you have anxiety and are angry with someone and want to tell them, you may want to call them on the phone, but making this call “hot” is not always the best option because it can lead to heated arguments. You better focus on making these kinds of “cold” calls. If you think that it is not easy to achieve it, then read on so that you have control of those intense emotions and you can also keep control of the situation.

How to make a cold call

Making these types of calls can make you really feel anxious, just like you would have that person face to face. It is necessary that you have some advice in mind to control the situation in the best possible way.

• • Make an outline. Before picking up the phone to call, make a written outline of what you want to express verbally. This way you will have more control over what you want to say and how to say it. In the scheme you can put different answers that you can get from your interlocutor to have different answers ready and that the conversation can flow more normally.

• • Think about the other person’s needs. Remember that in the same circumstance there are different perspectives. So maybe the other person has a different perspective than you and it would be understandable so it is important that you keep this in mind. Practice your empathy to put yourself in the shoes of the other person and even if it costs you a bit to take into account their position, you can keep it in mind in the conversation.

• • Keep a positive attitude. If you have anxiety about the call you want to make or if the other person calls you, act like you’re not afraid. In this way you can shape your thoughts so that your mind does not sabotage you. Sit up straight while speaking, speak with a smile on your face, and of course, keep all your confidence in your words. That extra confidence will help you feel in control of the situation.

• • Practice what you are going to say. Just as the outline helps you put your mind in control of the situation, it is also a good idea to practice what you want to say to the other person. If necessary, you can record yourself speaking and listen to that recording to be able to make the changes you need in your speech. If you think you are not objective enough, ask someone for their opinion.

• Take notes. As much as possible take notes during the conversation. This will help you avoid falling into negative thought patterns and focus on what the other person is saying and above all, what you want to say again. You can also have a written record of everything you have talked about and be able to consult for future conversations if necessary.

Alternatives to cold calling

If calling on the phone gives you a lot of anxiety, then maybe it is not working for you … You may need another approach to be able to carry out these types of situations. What really matters is that when you do it you are not “in hot” because your reactions could be too extreme. To do this, it is important that you first reflect on your emotions and feelings and that you only start talking or making the call when you have your emotions under control.

If you feel that you have too much anxiety to be able to resolve conflicts properly, then it will be important to speak with a professional to help you control your emotions first. From the calm everything will be much easier than if you do it with too much emotional intensity. Once you have all this clear, if you put it into practice, it will be much easier for you to make a call to resolve a conflict with another person.