The bisexuality is the most sexual orientation invisibilized all. And it is that when a person who is bisexual has a partner of the same sex, he becomes considered homosexual; But when you have a partner of the opposite sex, you automatically think that you are heterosexual. This is one more form of biphobia, a discrimination that bisexual people suffer in their own flesh on a daily basis.

Those who are bisexual are not only made invisible, but are also forced to deal with a large number of myths. Since someone who is bisexual is vicious, until this orientation is nothing more than a phase, going, of course, with believing that someone who is bisexual can never be faithful; All these myths are part of an imaginary that starts from biphobia as its base. Despite the fact that there is a fairly powerful fight against homophobia (although this has not yet disappeared, unfortunately), the fight against biphobia seems to have taken a back seat when it is as toxic as the first.

To contribute our grain of sand to the fight against biphobia, we have decided to point out all those false myths that exist against bisexuality and to dismantle them. Because, as always, discrimination must be fought knowingly and with high doses of empathy.

1. No, they are not vicious, they are bisexual

” How lucky to be bisexual, so they have a better chance of having relationships “; “It’s not that you like men and women, it’s that you’re vicious “; ” How are you going to like both things? What happens to you is that you have a calentón “. Any bisexual has had to deal with some of these claims, as toxic as they are wrong.

Bisexuality is defined, according to the State Federation of Lesbians, Gays, Transsexuals and Bisexuals (FELGTB), as ” a sexual orientation of those who feel sexual, emotional and / or romantic attraction towards people of more than one gender and / or sex, not necessarily at the same time, in the same way or with the same intensity “. On this basis, we can understand two things: sexual orientation is not chosen, not even to have a better chance of having relationships, and a bisexual person is not only sexually, but also romantically. It is not just something related to sex, but falling in love in general.Nobody chooses to be bisexual, or to become bisexual, to flirt more; This is one of the most widespread myths, and one of the most absurd. Because a bisexual person suffers discrimination for the mere fact of being bisexual throughout his life; no one would choose to suffer biphobia for pleasure, to be discriminated against , or to be constantly judged for their feelings.

2. It is not a phase, it is not something that is “exceeded”

Bisexuality is sometimes talked about as if it were a phase, without further ado. If a bisexual person is with someone of the same sex, they are identified as homosexual, and if they are with someone of the opposite sex, they are treated as if they were heterosexual. But it is neither one thing nor the other: it is bisexual. And that is not an intermediate phase between taking one step or another, it is simply another sexual orientation.

Carlos Castaño Rodríguez, a FELGTB activist, told the Huffington Post that “no one thinks that you might be bisexual when they see you with your partner. You are straight or homosexual . ” And this is an unequivocal sign that bisexuality has become invisible, and is now considered a phase.

3. There is no attraction ratio

” What do you like more, men or women? But, in what proportion? “, Is another of the big questions that bisexual people have to endure in their own skin day after day. But bisexuality does not consist of proportions, it does not imply that you like 40% women and 60% men, for example; It means that you can like both sexes, without any inconvenience.

The basis of the myths around bisexuality is the same: ignorance, and believing that you can only like men or women, and not both at the same time. This is what is considered biphobia, and it is what makes people believe that bisexual people are purely bisexual. But a bisexual person, like anyone else with a different identity, falls in love.

4. They are not unfaithful by nature, nor are they more likely to be.

Another thing that is often said about bisexual people is that they are much more unfaithful , because by liking both men and women they are more likely to be. And this is totally false, as well as irrational. Is it because you like more people that you are more likely to be unable to be faithful to your partner? Being faithful or unfaithful is not associated with a specific sexual orientation, but rather with the personality that each one has.

Infidelity occurs between heterosexual, homosexual and bisexual people in equal parts . Adducing that because you are more likely to be unfaithful sooner does not make sense, since everyone has the same chance of being so.

5. Bisexual people do fall in love

Another myth is that, since bisexual people are “vicious”, they never fall in love and only seek to maintain relationships without rhyme or reason . And this is false! Not only is it false, but it is one of the most damaging representations of biphobia. Believing this makes many people automatically distrust their partner if they are bisexual, and the relationship becomes torture for both of them. Love is something innate in the human being, whether we talk about romantic love or any other type of love. Being bisexual does not imply that the possibility of falling in love is annulled, far from it.

Biphobia must be fought with the same harshness as homophobia , but for this it is important to make visible that there is a problem. The best way to do this is to talk about bisexuality as clearly as possible, showing it for what it really is: one more sexual orientation. 

Elle Mcdonald

I am Elle Mcdonald Specializations in Psychology . Graduated in psychology from the University of Tennessee in 2000. Diploma of Advanced Studies in the Department of Personality, Evaluation and psychological treatments with excellent results.

First Level of Master in Clinical Psychology at the Center for Behavioral Therapists (recognized with a scientific-professional nature by the College of Psychologists)

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